Today I was offered a new job! This was the third time that I applied on this particular position and I determined that if I was looked over this time that I would start applying for positions outside of my company.

The position is for the Manager of Process and Planning and will start in June. I will no longer have 20 employees under me. In fact, I will no longer be a people manager and will instead manage my own work.

This is exciting for me since I find the most challenging part of my role has to do with managing people. Not shocking that people each have individual things going on in their lives that impacts their performance, attitude and ability do this jobs well. As you can imagine, a global pandemic has made that even more difficult.

Since stress can be bad for my disease, I couldn’t be more happy about this change. Not to say that my new role will not be stressful – I think it could be even more than what I am used to but overall, I am excited about the change.

Another pretty big change in my day to day is that I have been talking to a boy who has peaked my interest. It’s all new and exciting so far and I have no clue what will come of it but I plan on enjoying the time we’re sharing and seeing what is what. I already tried writing a post about this but ended up taking it down after less than a day so if I can overcome being such a pussy, there may be some more posts about him coming up.

Yesterday I also got my 2nd Moderna vaccine. My MS specialist is coming to Whitehorse next week so I finally get to meet her in person. My medication has been going relatively well. On Wednesday night I woke up with some pretty crazy stomach pain but last night I had no issues. Quick update on numerous things — more to come soon!

It has been a full year since I had my first incident with MS. It took 9 months since that incident to be diagnosed and a full year before I started taking medication to prevent the occurrence of experiencing MS episodes.

On Monday, I came home to get my voting card before going on a walk with my friend. When I arrived, I saw that I had a parcel waiting for me. The contents of this parcel were from a pharmaceutical company in Surrey, Bayshore, that will be sending me my MS medication.

Although I knew that this parcel would be arriving (it was late actually), seeing it sitting on the counter hit me like a ton of bricks. This meant that I needed to actually stop drinking. This meant that there was no more time left. This meant that my life as I have known it was over.

I went on my walk with tears running down my face. I had a difficult time explaining to my friend how I was feeling. I considered spending the rest of the day drinking and holding on to my old life as tight as I could. I thought about calling in sick for work the next day so I could drown in a pool of self sorrow.

That was two days ago. I’m in better spirits now than I was then. I did spend most of my evening drinking and pondering life as it once was. But I did come into work the next day. I see my MS doctor in person next week and I will ask her about drinking. For anyone who is interested, the drug that I started is called Tecfidera. So far, no side effects.

Let me start this post by explaining that when I am writing, it’s truly based on what I am feeling. I tell you this because I suspect I will contradict the fuck out of myself as this blog progresses because my feelings about MS and most other things, change every day.

Today, I wanted to write about the things I am afraid could happen – not with the disease itself, but with my lifestyle. I consider myself a very social person. I enjoy hanging out with people and socializing on my spare time. This has meant a lot of drinking since my 20s.

My concern now that I am going to have to cut back significantly on drinking, is that my friends won’t want to be my friends anymore. Not on purpose or anything, but who thinks of inviting the sober chick to the party? These are the thoughts going through my head right now. So, is this like starting life over again?

What does one do when you have so much free time that you didn’t have previously? I have been spending a lot of my time walking and am starting to focus more on my health but will need to find a hobby soon that will help occupy my time.

The most overwhelming thing for me is to imagine my whole life flipped upside down. Who knows what will happen? Certainly not me. These are the things that keep me awake lately..

Years prior to being diagnosed with MS, I was told that I had polycystic ovarian syndrome. What does that mean? Well, it means that I don’t regularly have a period and that if I wanted to have a baby that I would likely need to plan it and take pills to help.

It’s been kind of a blessing. I mean, growing up I always wanted to have babies of my own, but I have not met anyone that I have wanted to have babies with so I suppose it was not meant to be.

Well, suddenly things are changing. I have become very regular and can pretty much predict and track my cycle. What the hell? I’m almost 40 for fuck sakes. No one is looking to get pregnant now – that ship has sailed. Having a period every month sucks. Who wants to feel this way on the regular? Certainly not me.

I wonder if this explains all of the male interest lately. Like sharks they smell my blood. Gross, sorry for that visual. Now I’m irresistible, look out world 🙄.

You’d think at first glance that the snow is melting and summer is around the corner. No. That’s not what I meant.. it ‘s supposed to snow today and apparently snowed the whole time we were in Dawson. What I’m referring to, is that love is in the air. Unfortunately, for me that means shit is going to get weird.

On Sunday night, while still in Dawson City, I was sent a picture of a stuffed bunny in error by someone that I don’t speak with usually.

Since I was already a few drinks in, this random bunny picture ended up sparking a conversation. We chatted back and forth again on Monday night when I got home and although Luc seemed kind of strange, he told me that he needed a friend and when someone says they need someone to talk to, the right thing to do is listen.

That’s how this mess started. Tuesday and Wednesday we chatted back and forth for the majority of the day and on Wednesday, we decided that we would meet over the weekend for appies at Earls.

The next morning I woke up to 60 missed text messages. They were scary. To give you an idea:

“You would have loved me”

“I do love u”

“I want you. I can’t have you”

“I’m committed to u whether u realize it or not”

“Your the only one I have any interest in”

“I just want to serve u and do whatever u want”

This is just a tiny glimpse into the texts. There must have been 200-300 (once I started responding at 3:00 am, he would answer what I said with 25 texts.) Needless to say, the date is never happening and I am concerned about going for walks alone and he might show up randomly at my work. Blockity blockity block. #seeyounever

Next day I matched with a gorgeous military man in Alaska. Legit well out of my league but decided to respond to his message anyway. After talking for a day or so he asked me to send him $200 so that he could get a leave from the boat and promised he’d pay me back as soon as he landed. He even did a video call with me with a video of the hot dude crying… it was pretty impressive. Except he played it upside down so I laughed at him. I obviously did not send the money but when I told him where to go, I complimented his persistence and told him about playing the video upside down and that his phone number wasn’t from Boston, where he claimed to be. Maybe I ended up helping him scam his next victim better.. oops! I asked that he forward me the real name of the dude he was cat-fishing, but he never did. Díck.

So, not sure if I’m just thirsty right now or if my pheromones are out here killing it but I feel like this blog could quickly turn into an erotic novel at this pace. Good luck friends.

Decided to take a couple of days off and head to Dawson City for the weekend for a festival called ThawDiGras.

I picked up my friend around 2 pm on Thursday and hit the road with a car packed with healthy snacks and more Jell-O shots than anyone over 30 should consume in a year, let alone a weekend!

We rolled into Dawson shortly after dinner time and stopped at some friend’s for a drink and to drop off some toiletries and a bag filled with McDonald’s cheeseburgers that were requested before we left Whitehorse.

Once we got to our hotel, we checked in and dropped off our things and another friend was looking to meet us out right away. The night gets blurry quickly but after some beverages, we parted ways and crashed for the evening.

Friday morning we woke up bright and early due to my dumbass forgetting to shut off my work alarm so there we were groggy and awake at 6:00 am. We picked up my friend who flew in that morning at 9:30 am – barely though,because 3.5 hours flew by very quickly.

I thought that night two we would have a little bit tamer of a night. Boy was I wrong. After a frigid walk around town, where I slipped on the ice and bit it btw, we had a few drinks out and then invited everyone to our hotel lobby to have Jell-O shots. We eventually met back up with friends and played charade. A 3rd place ribbon and a few poor decisions later and we went back to the hotel for the night. Not to sleep… to party.

Saturday was busy and we missed every event we tried to get to. We had martinis and a delicious Greek dinner then watched the fireworks and had some beverages in our hotel.

Sunday was colder outside. We were going to go dogsledding but it was too cold. After having breakfast and saying goodbye to everyone who didn’t stay Sunday night, we played some Chickenshit Bingo, watched a bit of tricycle races and visited with even more friends who live in Dawson! Our finale was strong and my recollection of all the events are fuzzy – if you know, you know so I won’t go into anymore details.

After breakfast on Monday and packing up my car, we bid our final goodbyes to our friends and to Dawson City after another successful visit with a plan to return again soon.

Tuesday was a pretty average day overall. Work then walk. Once I finished my walk though, I really felt like going for a whiteclaw. So, I did just that.

I was pleasantly surprised to see my friends there when I arrived and ordered myself a white claw and joined them.

After sharing a couple laughs, a guy from the table beside us went out to his vehicle and came back with a guitar. When he got settled back into his seat with his friends, he pulled out a binder and began singing and playing Irish music (Irish themed anyway.)

It was so refreshing hearing live music. I could literally feel my mood improve as he belted out song after song. I didn’t want to leave and felt hypnotized by his music.

When people say that music is good for the soul, it really is true. I drove home that night feeling refreshed and filled with happiness. Sometimes it’s the little things that make all the difference.

A lot of medical stuff happened today. My doctor must have sent an e-mail that got everyone jumping or something because I sure was popular.

Overall I have been kind of blue the past couple of days. Weird stalker aside, which I’ll update you on later, my mood has just been overall a little sad. I think that’s a thing, mood changes.

My nurses suggested that I get an app called Aby that is for people with MS. There seems to be quite a bit of information on things like diet, exercise, recipes, various podcasts and there is even access to chat with a nurse 24/7. It’s pretty neat – I need to spend some more time checking it out for sure but, one of the things I noticed was that as soon as you open it, it asks you to track two things: your mood and your your level of fatigue. I already knew that lack of sleep could impact me negatively but who knew this could make me moody. Great. Like I wasn’t an emotional wreck before MS 🙄.

Back to my day. Around noon when I was sitting down to a mouth watering double bacon cheeseburger – just kidding, I wish. Make that my usual salad with random protein (today was turkey in case you’re dying to know) and random berry (raspberry) to keep things fun, my cell phone rang. It was Manulife, telling me that my MS drugs were approved and that my case manager (first I’d heard of her!) would call me within 24 hours.

A mouthful of salad later and I was back on the phone with someone named Alexis, who I found out is my new support nurse for my MS drug therapy. They work in the background with my benefits people to make sure that things are covered and answer any prescription related questions for me. They also have a partner team who monitors my blood work for any abnormalities caused by my medication and flags it immediately for my doctor.

We’re now at least 30 minutes into my lunch and I am finally getting some time to ‘enjoy’ my salad. I have a meeting in less than 25 minutes so my focus is to on getting nutrients into my body.

Next caller is Aiko, my specialty drug case manager from Manulife. After answering lots of the same questions as the rest of my superhero team had, the only new information that I got was that they only cover my medication if I get it from a company called Bayshore. There goes my high hopes of racking up my optimum points from Shoppers Drug Mart with my incredibly expensive prescription. I talk until I am five minutes late for my meeting.

So there you have it folks, my MS team. Hopefully I don’t have to talk to them all at once again on the future, but it sure seems like I am a VIP with a bunch of assistants — that’s how I am going to choose to look at it anyway.

I’ll leave it at that for today. Friday is upon us and I can’t wait for the weekend! OH quick stalker update.. still blocked everywhere, still marked private on Instagram. I haven’t specifically heard from them but received a sus request the following afternoon from someone with no followers and who was following very little people. I denied it and nothing new to report.

Thought I would write about something different for once. About a week ago, this person started following me on Instagram. Nothing weird there, so I didn’t think anything of it. Sent him a follow back and saw that we had a few mutual friends that we follow and moved on with my life.

Fast forward to a couple of days later, I get a message in IG from the dude. Nothing weird, just friendly chat so I engage. Weird part is that he says he lives in Baltimore. First 🚩. Then goes on to tell me that he is working in Brazil and that he has been stuck there since the start of Covid, away from his 5 year old son to whom he is a single father.

🚩🚩 who leaves their kid with a nanny for a year, global pandemic or not?! So I look at his IG again and see that he also follows CBC North, CBC Nunavut and some other northern news type of pages.

He then sends me a message and asks if we can chat on WhatsApp instead of IG messenger. I say no and ask him if he lives in Whitehorse, which he denies. He says he has always wanted to live in Canada and follows Canadian news and just randomly has 5 people I know that live in Whitehorse. 🚩🚩🚩

I think he’s full of shit, but don’t stop responding when they message me. I figure this person lives in Whitehorse and for whatever reason wants to keep their identity a secret. Who gives a fuck? I am intrigued what lies I will be fed next. It’s alright having a secret friend.

I’ve made tons of friends that I haven’t met for years, or even at all, on the internet or my war game (hi Justin 😘) so this is really no different, right? WRONG.

We talk about life, me trying to buy a place and getting MS this past year. He feeds me lies about his ex being a drug addict and leaving their son and how he is also trying to buy a house. I suppose these things could be true but who the fuck knows at this point?!

He keeps pressing about WhatsApp so I finally say fine. He gives me his phone number to add him, which I immediately google. The number is from Louisiana 🚩🚩🚩🚩. I ask him about it and get tells me that that’s where his ex lives. Uh-huh.

As soon as we start using WhatsApp the feel changes from friends to flirty on his side. I quickly call attention to that and say that I didn’t want to be anything more than friends. Tried being real nice in case I was talking to a nut job. He responds that he needs more from me and that I have made him so happy over the past THREE DAYS. Yeah, that’s right, this has been 3 fucking days.

So, I am now a little in shock now am not sure what to say so I decide to not say anything. A few minutes later he says ‘I really want to lick your WAP (👅💦🍑)’ so then I say ‘What the actual fuck.’ and he deletes the message right away.

Well, now starts the blocking process. I start with WhatsApp since that’s where we’re talking. No sooner do I block him there do I receive a message on Instagram saying he can’t believe that I blocked him and that it was a typo and that he was trying to say that he wanted to drink a whisky. Uh-huh. I can’t figure out how to block on Instagram because I’ve never had to before, so I unfollow him and remove him as a follower. Then he TEXTS me because he can see my phone number from WhatsApp. I block his phone number (which is suspect to be fake) and eventually figure out how to block him on Instagram.

Needless to say, I won’t be making any new friends from IG for a while and I’ve decided to make my profile private for a bit. I’ll update here if anymore excitement comes from this mess!

Getting in shape is a drag, but has at least been something to occupy my time. Instead of going to my usual watering hole for a drink or two after work, I have been going on walks. This has been helpful in reducing stress as well – who knew?!

Salads are getting old fast but I’ve been making a real solid effort to up my intake of fruits and vegetables. I need to get some more creativity flowing in the kitchen but I’m sure that’ll come in time.

Drank too much on Saturday and had more than my weekly 10 that was recommended. Cute boys can cloud your judgement. Must. Be. Stronger.